Dare. Dream. Create.

The other night Jason and I got together for a dinner led by an incredibly talented chef and in the company of good friends and work colleagues. Outside the snow was coming down but we were cozy laughing, swapping stories, eating and sipping wine. It was just one of those nights that was guaranteed to leave us smiling for days after.

But before dinner was even served, I was introduced to a girl that would be stepping into another dear friend and coworker's position. My thoughts immediately went to this idea of a new addition to the team, before I realized that it was a replacement. My dear friend was leaving us, spreading her wings and flying out to start the next chapter in her book and this new girl would be the new her. As the evening went on with a gourmet adventure laced with merriment, the news was still processing in my mind. She was leaving. She was going somewhere else. Oh, my heart.

In any corporate environment, this would be commonplace; a company's employee list ebbs and flows all of the time. But we are still a smaller team that works closely together to create and to troubleshoot. We vent, we support, we laugh. It goes without saying that I will miss her. But much more importantly so, I am so, so very proud of her. Life presents so many opportunities for us to take but, if we're not ready or open to receiving them, we can very well miss them. We shy away from situations that lead to growth if they present unknown situations that scare us. We don't like change, even when change is the very thing we need. We are often scared of what we don't know and that far too often keeps us stagnant in life. Simply put, we have forgotten how to dream and how to create.

As the dinner wrapped up and it was time for us to leave, I turned and let out a casual "Have a good night!" as Jason and I headed towards the door. In a split second, I saw her guard lowering. Vulnerability. Tears began to well in her eyes. We were one of the last ones out of the building and that everyday goodbye meant something more to her this time. She would be facing a bigger goodbye in the future soon and it was scaring her. We hugged. I reassured her. Goodbye wasn't going to be tonight. And because the snow was getting worse, we walked out towards the car as my heart swelled with emotion.

It's possible that she will never read this, but that hasn't stopped me from letting her know how very proud I am of her for having the courage that not many others have to take a chance, spread her wings, try something completely new (and a little scary!) and follow a dream. Well done, girl!

Who Are You?

I often think about our words and actions, why we say and do what we do, what they mean and how they differ among the different relationships we keep. It's a very fine line we walk, with changes in rhythm, tone and inflection in our voices sending vastly different messages. But those rules apply to vocal conversations; the written word is guided by different rules. And social media is the toughest beast of all. Anyone can hide behind a screen and carelessly throw words out into the e-universe. And often enough when this happens, they don't stop to think of consequences, of whose lives they are affecting. And that is dangerous.

Recently, I received an anonymous comment on this blog that was pretty belittling and accusational in a matter-of-fact, passive aggressive kind of way. I'm not going to say what exactly was sent, but I went from being utterly shocked to angry to shocked that I was so angry. It was a pretty personal jab and it hurt. Like, hurt hurt. There were a million different responses that ran through my head that day, from snarky and right-back-atcha hurtful to holier-than-thou and kill-em-with-kindness. But at the end of the day, those anonymous words that were posted can only take meaning and shape if I let them. If I let my confidence down enough to let those words into my soul. The second I start questioning myself because of some anonymous words, I let myself down. Why would you choose to be disrespected by someone else or, more importantly, by yourself?

Which brings me to my point. Every word and action we send out into the universe becomes part of who we are. So, essentially we decide every day who we are. If someone is having trouble with their own life -- be it lack of self confidence or unhappiness in their own relationships -- I am determined to not let their troubles become mine. After all, somebody took time out of their day to track me down and post ill-intentioned words on my blog but didn't have enough self confidence to leave their name. I'm far from perfect, but I try my best to live as healthy and genuinely as I can. I can only walk away from this experience and hope that they eventually find happiness of their own.